Diner-Grade, Neurotoxic Potatoes

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If you’re anything like me, seven years ago your mom sent you an article about how the eyes on potatoes can contain dangerous neurotoxins, and you’ve subconsciously avoided dealing with them ever since.

Well, finally it occurred to me that I frequently entrust food prep to complete strangers (a fun, cool way of looking at restaurants), and they definitely aren’t getting neurotic about neurotoxins. And, I’m still alive. The truth has set me free.

Since then, I’ve been experimenting with hash browns and other breakfast potatoes. I came up with one that’s of almost a diner-like quality, and is only kind of extremely unhealthy.

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Olive oil is not butter.

I like using baby yukon gold potatoes, but you can probably sub in any kind. I don’t know if that’s true. I’m not a potato expert. Anyway, the baby yukon golds are easy to slice. They also have a thin skin – relatable! – so you can skip peeling them. Slice the potatoes thinly and arrange on a skillet with some garlic. I sprayed on some aerosol olive oil in an attempt to be healthy, but there wasn’t enough sizzling so I gave up and added some butter. Once they were satisfyingly crispy, I topped with a little cheese, salt, and pepper.

I don’t want to brag and say that I think these could hold up as a forgettable side dish at a 2am diner…but I don’t think that they couldn’t. That might be the neurotoxins talking.

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